Wednesday, January 2, 2013

Tolkien Geekery: the Trek to Rivendell

Since our cinema is closed for repairs and I’m not up to traveling an hour or so to see An Unexpected Journey, She Who Must Not Be Named and I are watching our extended-release Lord of the Rings again, one DVD a night (which means we’ll be done in six more nights.

Watching the first one, I’m again reminded of one of my peeves about some interpretations of these works. This one comes from the late Karen Wynn Fonstad’s excellent The Atlas of Middle-earth. It’s a wonderful work, but in it, she claims to be perplexed that Frodo’s journey to Rivendell takes longer than Bilbo’s since the latter’s party was mounted.

After shaking my head, I feel the need to point out a few things she’s evidently not considered:

1. Ponies are not speedy. There are exceptions, but most ponies are bred for one of two things: burden bearing and comfort-riding. When a speedy mount is wanted, generally one breeds for longer legs, and that’s not a feature of a pony. So, unless they cantered all day long, Thorin and company probably didn’t make much better time than they would have walking: they simply did so in more comfort, which suits the general tenor of the expedition. 

Aragorn, on the other hand, led Frodo’s company on a forced march, suffering deprivation for the sake of speed.

2. The Dwarves didn’t make speed a priority. How do I know that? Simple: they carried instruments for a thirteen-piece band with them. Sure, the Dwarves are engaged in ‘dark business,’ but they're also traveling in style, including a train of baggage ponies. This, to me, jibes well with Thorin’s way of doing things as presented in The Hobbit. I think or at least hope they left those nice instruments at the House of Elrond once they realized there was a time limit (Durin’s Day), but this new urgency clearly caused a change in plans. I’m not sure the Dwarves even planned to take the pass behind Rivendell in the first place: without a blizzard blocking them, passing the Redhorn would've been easy, even for such a large cavalcade. Steering the expedition away from the Dimrill Dale seems to have been either luck or Gandalf and Elrond’s machinations, since they knew the White Council might move against the Necromancer (Sauron) soon: even though Gandalf had warned Thorin off that foe, the tale bears ample evidence the king followed his own mind. I think it most likely the diversion was the result of that ‘higher power’ at work, moving Bilbo towards the Ring.

Frodo’s company made speed their top priority, especially after Frodo was wounded. They pressed hard, so it’s natural they’d make better time.

3. Thorin and Co. followed the road as long as they could. For whatever reason, Gandalf didn’t lead them by the swiftest way, possibly because he was having enough trouble herding Dwarves as it was without making the more comfort-loving of them. Thorin seems not, to me, to be the least of these, but Dori and Nori are described as liking their meals ‘plenty and often,’ and Bombur was obviously not a hardened trekker. 

By contrast, Aragorn led the Hobbits directly across country, skipping great loops of the road and generally making as straight a line as possibly while avoiding being seen.

4. Even fast mounts eat up time because of the care and rest they require. There’s a reason post riders have new mounts and people to care for them stationed at regular intervals: if the rider has to care for and rest his own horse, he’s slowed down. True, ponies don’t require frequent resting the same way a fast horse does, but consider that someone had not only to remove the gear from the Dwarves' mounts (presumably each dwarf took care of his own, but again, I wonder about Thorin the Haughty), but to tend to the baggage train. That meant, even if one Dwarf handled each pack pony, twice as long to set up camp and to get going the next day. Who knows? The Dwarves may've unlimbered all that musical gear for a song or two each night. Since they were toting it, I certainly hope so.

The Hobbits, led by Aragorn, seem to have usually settled in the brush after Sam, probably with help, tending to Bill.

I haven’t done a long journey like this, but I have had the thrill of caring for my horse after a fifteen-mile trail ride. It takes a little bit of time and effort, and I wasn’t removing tack and every day, nor to multiple mounts. I can see cutting the travel time to ten miles or so for the sake of taking on all this at a relaxed pace.

5. The Trolls. Bilbo’s party obviously stopped to recover from the ‘Troll incident’ not only to recover from their mistreatment, but to find and cache the Troll’s treasure. Frodo’s party only briefly stopped at the same place. 

As for the speed of the Dwarves ‘picking up’ after that, rough country is one place ponies are faster than people, so long as there’s no actual climbing to be done. Too, by then, the Dwarves were suffering privation and now willing, no doubt, to press on. More than that, they didn’t have Ringwraiths to dodge: Aragorn did.


All in all, it’s quite easy for me to see how Bilbo took ten days (or more) longer to come to Rivendell than Frodo. And yes, I know my objections don’t account for all the inconsistencies between the two journeys many of which are no doubt due to Tolkien’s new vision of the world he’d created by the time he was writing The Lord of the Rings. But it’s an amusing exercise, and I think that my objections make at least some sense.

Tune in later when (or if) I tackle the ‘why didn’t the eagles carry them into Mordor?’ toe-suckers.

Wednesday, May 23, 2012

This was supposed to be a silly parody like all my silly song parodies, but, probably thanks to some of the things I've read today, things got… different.

This will likely be the only thing that ever shows up in this blog, so make the most of it:

Faulkner Kind of Man

(Sing to Lynyrd Skynyrd's 'Simple Man')


My mother told me, when I was two
Do like I say, boy, not like I do
Pay close attention, I've seen it all
Without my wisdom, you're sure to fall

And I'm a Faulkner kind of man
The kind of person no one sane can understand
I find my heart fighting
With my mind
To value mores or love mankind?

Oh son you're going into the world
And there I'm sure that you'll find a girl
For lots of tramps do walk on this earth
Don't place them before who gave you birth

And I'm a Faulkner kind of man
The kind of person no one sane can understand
Take fleeting pleasures, tote long regrets
Pretend to freedom, while my bonds fret

Oh, keep your faith, boy
In God above
Place his rules over
All thoughts of love
Remember this world's
A vale of tears
You're marking time so
Endure your years

And I'm a Faulkner kind of man
The kind of person no one sane can understand
Love where I come from, and hate it, too
Seek for redemption with soul askew

With darkened heart
Walking to and fro
One eye fixed upward
One, down below
I tread the sharpened
Barbed-wire fence
Trying to force life to make some sense

And I'm a Faulkner kind of man
The kind of person no one sane can understand
My better nature
Is all unwound
My childhood lessons
Fury and Sound